Part 3

Last week I lost my job. I would be more worried if I hadn't already paid my rent. I'm worried though, the job market is basically null. I've gone job hunting everyday, smoked everynight. My Mom has been trying to call me the past few days, we haven't talked to each other in months, not since she found out about the drugs. I haven't touched coke since, but man do I crave it at times. Its hard trying to live up to an older sibling. Trish is the perfect daughter. She never gave my parents a moment grief. We're only 3 years apart. I moved out by the time I was 15. Luckily my Mom's sister loved me enough to take me in. I worked hard all year to pass my Gen Eds(which isn't too difficult) and then started some college courses. I had too much fun partying though, and my Aunt got married. So it was back to the parents, sneaking around, getting high. My mom basically kicked me out be the time I was 17.

Seth isn't into hard drugs, which I guess is good for me. He goes to school part times, works full time at a skate shop. I should try and be a little bit more focused with my life, but I'm not. I've never been a huge religious person. I can't deny a Divine being or power, it makes sense that there is a higher energy. One thing I do believe in, is Karma. So maybe since I don't care about really anything with life..life doesn't care about me. Life favored my sister, its not like I strived for attention. What if I tried to start caring about..anything.

I rode my bike over to Seth's apartment. Another day of useless job hunting. With the economy places were never hiring. I felt completely down. I walked into his front room and kicked off his shoes. His roomate, Kyle, was chilling on the sofa.

"Hey Alex. Looking for Seth?" He said, looking me up and down.
"Yeah. I assume he's not home yet?"
"No. Want to hang out until he gets hom?" he looked at me greedily. I had already picked up my pace to his bedroom.
"I think I'll just wait in his room" I walked into Seth's room and closed the door. I found our stash and rolled a J. I heard a knock on the door. "Come in"
"I was going to say, if you ever want, you know, more than the green I'd gladly help." It was tempting
"I don't have money." I said. The pot was making my body tingle.
"I take other forms of payment" he said. I wanted to puke. Kyle was disgusting. I knew exactly what he wanted. I heard the front door open, Seth, thank God.
"Hey baby. Sorry I was late" he said, pushing Kyle to the side and closing the door behind him. "Any luck with a job?"
"No" I said sadly.
"You'll find work. If you need, you can stay here for a bit". That sounded nice, minus Kyle. He kissed me softly on the lips, and soon both of us were yet again tangled in each other. I felt very safe in his arms.
MJ